#literally on the first day too
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it's very homophobic that I have to take my SAT tomorrow. on pride month????
#literally on the first day too#this is criminal#i should be spending tomorrow at the record store collecting nine inch nails cds but alas.#me posts
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you're in the habit of denying yourself things.
if someone asked you directly, you would say that you love a little treat. you like iced coffee and getting the cookie. you drink juice out of a fancy cup sometimes, and often do use your candles until they gutter out helplessly.
but you hesitate about buying the 20 dollar hand mixer because, like. you could just use your arms. you weren't raised rich. you don't get to just spend the 20 dollars (remember when that could cover lunch?), at least - you don't spend that without agonizing over it first, trying to figure out the cost-benefits like you are defending yourself in front of a jury. yes, this rice cooker could seriously help you. but you do know how to make stovetop rice and it really isn't that hard. how many pies or brownies would you actually make, in order to make that hand mixer worthwhile?
what's wild is that if the money was for a friend, it would already be spent. you'd fork over 40 without blinking an eye, just to make them happy. the difference is that it's for you, so you need to justify it.
and it sneaks in. you ration yourself without meaning to - you don't finish the pint of ice cream, even though you want to. the next time you go to the store, you say ah, i really shouldn't, and then you walk away. you save little bits of your precious things - just in case. sometimes you even go so far as putting that one thing in your shopping cart. and then just leaving it there, because maybe-one-day, but not right now, there's other stuff going on.
you do self-care, of course. but you don't do it more than like, 3 days in a row. after that it just feels a little bit over-the-edge. like. you can't live in decadence, the economy is so bad right now, kid.
so you don't buy the rice cooker. you can-and-will spend the time over the stove. you can withstand the little sorrows. denial and discipline are practically synonyms. and you're not spoiled.
it's just - it's not always a rice cooker. sometimes it is a person or a job or a hug. sometimes it is asking for help. sometimes it is the summer and your college degree. sometimes it is looking down at scabbed knees and feeling a strange kind of falling, like you can't even recognize the girl you used to be. sometimes it is your handprint looking unsteady.
sometimes it is tuesday, and you didn't get fired, and you want to celebrate. but what is it you like, even? you search around your little heart and come up empty. you're so used to denying that all your desires draw a blank.
oh fuck. see, this is the perfect opportunity. if you had a mixer, you'd make a cake.
#warm up#this isn't good#writeblr#this is complicated by the fact i can't stand up too long or i fuckken pass out and <3 hit my damn head <3#but i did take a deep breath and buy myself the stupid rice cooker#and!!! a very cheap sushi kit!!! i have been wanting to try making sushi for literally YEARS#the kit was only like 15 dollars!!!! and i haven't purchased it bc?!!??!?!?!?!!?#..... i didn't get the mixer tho that felt. like a lot. like too much.#on my list is a kitchenaid. one day when i get a check and i have paid off my student debt#and medical debt#i will put that first little bit of cash#into a kitchenaid 5qt stand mixer (with attachments)#i really do just go into their refurbished section and stare lustily at each option#but yeah i feel guilty about the rice cooker even tho i know for a fact this damn thing is gonna be a lifesaver#oh shit also fuck i forgot to mention . poached eggs
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happiest girl in the whole entire world
thinking about my favourite kind-hearted eldritch horror trapped in the body of my favourite traumatized goth girl
(+ purple variant)
#nona the ninth spoilers#nona the ninth#the locked tomb fanart#the locked tomb#the locked tomb spoilers#harrowhark nonagesimus#tlt spoilers#tlt#alecto the first#nona tlt#nona the ninth fanart#Vague Pyrrha & Paul in the bg#I miss reading those books man#Fanart#digital art#Recommending them to literally everyone I meet#Cuz man tlt did a number on my brain#On Harrow’s brain too lmao#I love making Harrow look inconsistent in every piece of fanart I do#My excuse is that its a book and her face on the cover of HtN and NtN is very small ok#One day I’ll settle on a design I like#That day is not today (two weeks left of my semester and I’m losing it)
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happy summer 2024✌
#is my art becoming lazier and lazier with time? yes.#they literally saved my life in 2024#I'm so happy that my potc obsession is back#I drew will and elizabeth for the first time too#I love my pirate king#i love them all so much i'm crying#also i'm waiting for the day that barbossa gets a bigger hat so it can take the whole canvas space#pirates of the caribbean#potc fanart#potc#will turner#elizabeth swann#jack sparrow#hector barbossa#jack the monkey#joshamee gibbs#pintel#ragetti
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Ya'll want to know the funniest shit?
I'm researching the era when Alastor was alive right now to get a better idea of both his character, the life he lived before Hell, and to hash out a backstory for him.
And so, apparently, Alastor lived through the Prohibition (which was basically the United States government illegalizing the manufacture, transportation, and sale of alcohol because they thought it was the cause of a lot of domestic violence and child abandonment).
Alastor canonically died in 1933.
Do you know how long the Prohibition lasted?
From 1920-1933.
ALASTOR LITERALLY DIED THE SAME YEAR ALCOHOL BECAME LEGAL AGAIN. CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW BITTER HE MUST'VE BEEN?
The Prohibition officially ended on December 5, 1933, and now my headcanon is that Alastor died December 6, 1933. Literally the day after he could legally drink all the booze he wanted.
I am learning a LOT about New Orleans and the era Alastor lived through (including the gay community in the city at the time) which has been a lot of fun, and I just wanted to share that tidbit because it is so fucking funny to me.
#guys i just#its so funny#can you imagine Alastor gets the news#everything is awesome#the next day he's planning to go out drinking and have a good time#but first he needs to get rid of this body#it shouldn't take too long#just a few hours#and THEN this motherfucking hunter decides to ignore hunting laws and mistakes him for a deer#when he wakes up he's in Hell#I can just imagine the realization setting in#he's SO bitter and angry about it#he was about to get shit-faced and have a fun time at a party#and now he's suffering eternal punishment#he couldn't even get a proper drink first#it was just a fun tidit#ALSO#the gay community in New Orleans at the time is so fascinating#they literally entire communities and neighborhoods#and a lot of it was from mixed race people#and we know Alastor is mixed race#AH I have so so many thoughts#hazbin hotel#alastor#hazbin alastor#hazbin hotel alastor#the radio demon#hazbin hotel fanart#alastor hazbin hotel#alastor the radio demon
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love playing the guessing game of Is This Accidentally Gay or ““Accidentally”” Gay? with the tangled show (the crew members who were sneaking as much as they could past the disney higher ups are truly god’s strongest soldiers) 🫡
#there’s also the entire rest of the rapunzel day one episode#bc it’s literally just an au where she meets and falls in love with cassandra first instead of eugene but that’d be too many screenshots 😔#tangled the series#rapunzel’s tangled adventure#cassunzel#tangled rapunzel#tangled cassandra#tts rapunzel#tts cassandra#rta rapunzel#rta cassandra
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getting the attention of the humanoid typhoon
#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun#trigun maximum#wolfwood menace arc#he also wouldnt know HOW obvious to make it so he's just ramping it up throughout the day#but vash is sooooo used to repressing but also experiencing this kind of want so strongly for the first time#makes him wear the most obvious expressions.... while wolfwood is ALSO not used to being wanted in this way so he would be none the wiser#to vash's obvious expressions -- does that make sense. theyre silly. theyre so silly its like an endless loop#and then wolfwood is like ok i guess im doing something wrong or maybe he just doesnt want me like that. whatever! we move on#vash: dying crumbling - wondering if ww is doing it on purpose but also too nervous to ask until he starts literally taking off layers#ruporas art
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Transformers ARK: Ironhide!
Ironhide! 🧨
Ironhide’s been around for quite a while and much prefers to handle things the old fashioned way: with fists and his trusty plasma cannons. Gruff and ornery, this once untrusting bot has grown to be extremely loyal to Optimus and the autobot cause, becoming something of Prime’s personal guard. His rough demeanor can be intimidating to new cadets, but his strictness comes from a place of caring and passion.
In fact, it comes as a shock to most at how gentle and kind he can be with his young charge, Bumblebee. But of course, the bots closest to him know just how soft the spark is under all that armor. (Hence why Optimus was so adamant on assigning Ironhide of all bots to become Bumblebee's guardian)
#Transformers ARK#TFArk#ARK!Ironhide#transformers#ironhide#transformers ironhide#tf fanart#transformers fanart#transformers bumblebee#maccadam#TF ARK Ironhide#hes so old man core#bro complains about his back like 12 times a day#and how he's way too old to be looking after a youngling#(would literally gut the first person to ever suggest choosing someone else to be his guardian)#(He loves that kid with his whole spark)#he also loves his WIFE (Chromia)#He mentions his wife as much as his bad back#His wife could beat him up and thats why he loves her so much#Spotify
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That middle child feel when you’re the one who successfully gets you and your siblings out of trouble only to immediately get jumped by them afterwards
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rise leo#pouring one out for all my fellow middle children 😔#Donnie betraying his fellow middle child like this…even being the one to throw him under the bus first smh#no but like if I was Leo here I’d be like wtf guys#it does make me wonder if Leo constantly was the one who got them all out of messes#and in turn the main one who took the fall if his attempts failed rip#we kinda see this often in the series tbh? where Leo takes point when it comes to talking out a situation#maybe it started very very young as seen in this short#(actually there is no ‘if’ Leo was the one doing this he literally WAS at least twice as tots from what we’re shown)#side eyes Bug Busters where Leo gets his bros out of being turned into clowns and immediately gets blasted 😭#no thanks in sight#can’t even blame him for being a sore winner there I would be too lol#and then he gets thrown off a building like man all around an f tier day for Hamato Leonardo#side note but Leo’s face stripes look especially pink in this lighting and I really like when we can see that pinkness because it looks cute
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freak.
#spn#1.06#4.04#4.20#4.21#5.18#5.22#7.02#7.03#13.03#spoonfeeding you some more bc i cant go 2 days around here without seeing a bad take#btw that moment from 'the rapture' is crazy i forgot abt it. first of all claire saw sam like that too#second: dean was Terrified. sam raises his hand to exorcise the demon behind him and dean literally flinches......#abuse rooted in fear <333333333#anyway ppl have the fucking nerve to act scandalized when someone calls dean homophobic lmfao#learn what 'coding' is outside of the context of your uninspired ship agenda#tag vomit#visual meta
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I SWEAR CELEBI'S THINGY IS COMING SOON BUT I REALLY WANTED TO POST THIS ALRIGHT
yeaah... future trio got me too...
and Darkrai is there too, because of course he is.
hey look i drew a cute Drifloon :D
...ignore the rest
whatever started at Darkrai doodles ended in brainrot of future trio + darkrai and I'm blaming @scribz-ag24 for this
#Can you believe between the first pic and the 4th pic is only a week inbetween. I sure can't but like why did I mirror the pose...#ON ACCIDENT??? Everytime I look at the two Grovyles I'm like... how... how did they end up so differently???#also probably blaming @cozybells as well for this but I really fear tagging people so I'm just letting y'all know in the tags because#I do wanna let everyone know who inspired me when someone did <333 better get running [you know who you are!!!!] DusnoirXDarkrai is next...#also: upon seeing scribz-ag24's art my brain said: You need to color too! ah yeah that went well with the doodle batch#I really hope you're able to read everything with how messy I can write sometimes. If not please let me know and I'll add sth in this post!#Also the doodle batch was the first thing I drew so well... never drew dusknoir before and grovyle once i think...#please go easy on me I have yet to explore the relationship between literally everyone😭 and I have no idea what I‘m doing and I'm a little#lost I normally only draw King Boo or Darkrai but I'm sure scribz-ag24 sprinkling in bits of Darkrai got me in love with the future trio to#grovyle#future trio#celebi#darkrai#dusknoir#pmd hero#pokemon#drifloon#totodile#my art#my stuff#tagas friend spoiler#pmd#pokemon mystery dungeon#IS THERE A SHIP NAME FOR FUTURE TRIO... there must be. ...oh... is it just...#futuretrioshipping#i feel sooo stupid rn.#also everytime i drew darkrai i had evil spiteful bastard in mind (except for the one with an arrow pointing out he's redeemed) but i think#i literally mixed every possible version of him in my head so got absolutely no clue what i'm doing :D#anyways i hope you enjoyed this and thanks for reading through my ramblings! Have such a wonderful rest of the day yippiee <333#pmd2
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hHELP HE,P HELP WHAT HAPPENED WHAT HAPPENED ?????? WHAT THE FREAK
#guys it’s only been 153 days since my first aba post I’m getting scared#THE ABA VIRUS THE ABA VIRUS NOOOOOOOOOO#I do like her expression in the older drawin tho she looks a lot grimy-er#she looks like jinx too idk why#this is what happens when u obsess over a character I think I remember seeing a post talking abt how this can literally change ur art style#FREAKY ABA#a.b.a#shitpost#a.b.a guilty gear#guilty gear aba
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more clone^2 memes because i think they're funny
#dpxdc#dp x dc#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#clone^2#danny fenton is not the ghost king#so canon to clone^2 and clone damian the portal that ends up transporting damian to amity park is left pr ambiguous#so really how he got there could be one of many things whether it be through divine intervention or clockwork's doing or hell#it could've also been quite literally the 1 in 1 millionth chance that a natural portal opened up beneath him and sent him to amity#and was a happy accident#but the idea that the laz pits or another adjacent such entity heard damian wanting an older brother (he meant og damian but oops never-#specified) and then sends him to the one person who could fulfill that wish and make him happy at the same time.#was really funny to me within the context of the lilo and stitch meme. the meme can also be seen the other way around with danny as lilo#and damian as stitch. but danny being stitch was infinitely funnier and ~technically~ more accurate imo#danny technically IS a nice angel but also. he's a developing menace to society (just ask wes) and he's going to make damian one too#danny being from the midwest means he has a midwestern accent and thats not something the bats know how to handle when they finally meet hi#hey look at that! my meme making skills are steadily improving. im no longer making the same joke six different times in different formats#those first two images i made a few days ago the rest i made in the last thirty minutes in a spur of clone^2 induced inspiration#and procrastination of writing the cfau rewrite of the first post. we are 10k words deep folks and just barely got past the 1st gala reunio#dunking on the giw is a god-given right and danny WILL pass it down to damian
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eddie diaz + american teenager (ethel cain)
this was a commission for bia @buddieblr whom i adore very very much!! thank you my boy!!!!! <3 (youtube)
#my first commission YIPPEEE!!!!!!#this was literally a day and a half turnaround hahahha cause im insane and have too much time off work rn#i love it a lot and i love bia even MORE#911#911 edit#eddie diaz#evan buckley#christopher diaz#ethel cain#911 abc#my vids#abby is making
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#kirby#daily kirby#my art#digital#hal laboratory#nintendo#I read so much tamora pierce as a kid#both circle and tortall#though I was more partial to tortall overall#I haven't reread any of them in a while#but it occurred to me somewhat recently that like. I basically did a keladry irl#I just got sick before I could finish#(combat roles were closed to 'females' until literally the day I signed the paperwork in 2015)#(like I'd already chosen something else but the recruiters called me later that day like 'hey they just changed the rules')#(I wasn't The First to go into training and so on because I was partway through my last quarter of college)#(altho kel was too young to take advantage the moment the law changed it's just that no one else tried first in her case)#but idk I spent a long time kinda pretending it never happened for Complicated Brain Reasons#so I don't think it's fully sunk in yet still
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DATV Mini-Rant about the lack of Lyrium Potions in this Game
A small thing that immediately made my stomach drop when playing DATV was the fact that there are no lyrium potions.
I did an elective on game design in university and chose Origins as my game of choice for my final essay because I always loved how much the game incorporated the world/lore in its game mechanics! Call it pathetic or sad (I won't blame you lmao) but this series was the first video game that engaged me so deeply with its story-telling that I wanted to dissect it. That's why I'm focusing on the lack of magical cocaine in a fantasy game series.
Lyrium is a substance that serves as a game mechanic and a major lore/world-building element. It's use is essential if you play the game as a mage or have party members that are mages - it replenishes mana in game, its use is central to being a mage within the story (harrowing, rituals, etc...), and it's a major export/plot relevant resource that is important to the world at large.
So imagine my surprise when I boot up DATV for the first time and there's no lyrium potions as a mage character. My main interest in the game series was for its lore and story (RIP) so I didn't look too hard into developer interviews or videos about the combat itself - it would either be good or bad, but that wasn't my main draw to the game. I kept playing, wondering if I would ever unlock another slot for potions, perhaps, but then it was abundantly clear that it wasn't the case.
It's a small thing, but popping a lyrium potion mid-combat has the same effect that hearing people say 'Maker's breath' and 'Thank the Maker' does. It's this little bit of world-building that reminds me that I'm playing a Dragon Age game. It's not just a 'mana potion' or some other glowy blue magic vial...it's this substance that's important to the world and that has a reason to be there beyond rejuvenating my mage.
It's the major export of Orzammar -> the pillar of its economy.
It's the substance that allows waking mages to enter the Fade -> it allowed me to save Connor Guerrin with the aid of other mages.
It's the substance that the Chantry uses to leash it's templars through addiction -> an addiction I encouraged Cullen to overcome in DAI.
It's the substance used in the Rite of TRANQUILITY.
It's the substance that allows my warrior character to take on the templar specialization in each game -> Alistair and Ser both talk about lyrium and its relevance to training (in DA2 you just do it lmao)
It's the substance burned into Fenris's skin by Danarius.
It's the literal blood of the Titans -> lyrium veins are literal veins (such a cool design choice in DAI to make them look like blood capillaries!)
And all the time in DAO, DA2, and DAI my mage characters were downing this substance like there was no tomorrow.
Even though the combat changed in DA2 and DAI they still kept lyrium potions for mages. Even though they simplified herbalism from DAO in the next two games, they still required the player to interact with the world and find the ingredients for these potions. It was this gameplay mechanic that linked the player to the world -> I know that I need blood lotus to set shit on fire, elfroot for healing potions/lyrium potions, etc... It was cool game design, having game mechanics and lore interconnected like this.
(Not saying that picking up dozens of elfroots was fun or the best game design, btw -> but it's just an example of how they linked the world and game mechanics together, and I like the intent behind it! Cool design does not equal effective design lmao)
What do we get in DATV? No lyrium, whatsoever, just healing potions.
Potions we don't even have to work to find or get crafted! Just break some green shit and there it is! We don't pick up ingredients or discover unique flora to each of these Northern Areas for our own use. We don't loot potions or ingredients from corpses, sacks, boxes, chests (etc...) to replenish our own stock. A healing potion in this game is not a potion you craft, made from ingredients you found, it's a button I press on my controller. It's lost that immersive link - especially when your companions can toss another one at you while being effectively immortal in combat.
The only new flora we hear of is Broma's Bloom which I did like the lore behind! It's used in dye to colour the Warden's armour and its growth is a sign that the damage of the Blight is lessening. I love that! That's a cool bit of lore! Especially since it's named after Andraste's mother in a land that is supposed to be extremely religious. Geographically unique flora and fauna (biodiversity) is just as important as architectural design when designing an area - DAI did this amazingly well with the different creatures and plants we could run into in each area!
The first time we meaningfully talk about lyrium is when we go to Kal Sharok for the first time - a decent amount of game time since the beginning of the game, depending how fast you play. And then, when we get there, the lyrium looks like a bunch of crystals from a 'grow your own lyrium' kit. The absence of lyrium from the game world and mechanics is something that was very hard for me to overlook considering its importance to every previous entry. Especially since in this game we address the fucking Titan's and what the fuck happened to them.
Just...imagine playing a mage in Dragon Age and not using lyrium?
This game is a death of a thousand cuts - so many small, meaningful world-building elements and mechanics brushed off - before fucking godzilla comes along and nukes it all with the handling of the main story/lore.
#bring back fictional cocaine aka lyrium dust!#on the subject of lyrium related drama -> why can't i tell Cullen he's drinking dwarven god blood?!#my man would never have lyrium again if he knew that lmao#literal templar blood magic and I can't tell anyone?? >:(#first thing i did when i finished that dlc was to run to Cullen to see if there was any unique dialogue#lyrium visual design in this game was awful - why does it look like something I grow from a kit you could buy? why do I want to lick it?#looks like a ring lollipop#what the hell happened to the titans too?? 'baby's first titan' - why is it so empty?#the one in DAI had a little SEA inside it - not to mention clouds / light source / plants / homes / birds etc...#“it's dead-” -> no it's angry! apparently?! Harding channels it or whatever. I don't care - it's lame and such a downgrade >:(#lyrium#should I do a my meta tag? probably lmao#datv critical#dragon age the veilguard#bioware critical#veilguard critical
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